


Time Flies

by Monsieur_Grenouille



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Childhood Friends, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:34:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29571822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsieur_Grenouille/pseuds/Monsieur_Grenouille
Summary: A collection of short stories and drabbles surrounding Charlie and Mac’s friendship.
Relationships: Charlie Kelly & Mac McDonald
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	1. Suicide Pact

**Author's Note:**

  * For [idkmybffspock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/idkmybffspock/gifts).



> Gifted to idkmybffspock because they asked for some Charlie & Mac fics about two months ago and I just remembered that

“Where do you think we go when we die?” asked Mac, staring at the stars. 

Charlie shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe we go to the place we were happiest when we were alive. But, like, as a ghost.” 

“So you promise to wait for me at the playground when you die?” 

Charlie punched him playfully. “Only if you don’t die first, dumbass.” 

Mac smiled and put his hands behind his head. He felt the wind blow through his duck-fuzz brown hair. “But really... on a serious note... if I don’t make it into heaven because I’m not good enough for God, I hope you’re in hell with me.” 

“Well, then it wouldn’t really be hell. I think the real punishment would be if I was sent to hell and you went to heaven. I mean, sure, you’d be happy, but you wouldn’t have me.” Charlie turned his head and saw Mac was crying silently. Tears were just falling down his face one after the other, not making any sound. The shorter boy sat up on his elbows. “You okay?”

”Yeah, I just... I just don’t want to die without you. If we do everything together, then we’d have the same amount of sins, and we’d be in the same place when we die. And we should die at the same time, too. That might increase our chances.” 

Charlie nodded. “So we die together, then. You promise?”

Mac held Charlie’s soft hand and squeezed it tightly. “Promise.” 


	2. Schmitty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why Charlie hates Schmitty

“I hate Schmitty.” Charlie took a drag on his cigarette. “He’s such a d-bag.” He grimaced and glanced at Mac. 

Mac shifted on the barstool. “Why? I don’t see why you’ve always hated him. Is it because he’s better than you?”

Charlie scoffed. “Better? No, no, Mac. If anything, I’m better than HIM. I bet he can only kill one rat at a time. I can get five at once.” He made a swinging motion with his arm, as if he was bashing invisible rats with an invisible club. “He was just mean to me, you know, when we lived together. You should’ve lived with me instead.” 

Mac stared blankly. “That answers nothing. Like, what would he do to you? Did he _touch_ you? Like, did he rape you?” He lowered his voice. Dennis cocked his head. 

“Schmitty wouldn’t do that, Mac,” Dennis waved his hand dismissively and leaned on the counter. “But really, Charlie, did he rape you? Is that what happened?” He put his hand on Charlie’s shoulder. Charlie shrugged it off with a quiet _don’t touch me._

“No, he didn’t do that. He didn’t touch me. But he would make fun of me. You know how words are hard and shit? Like, they don’t make sense to me?”

Dennis nodded. “Your evident yet undiagnosed dyslexia, yeah.”

”He’d, like, ask me to read to him. He’d hand me some shit like War and Peace, and then ask me to read it to him. He’d make fun of me when I couldn’t, and it was like elementary school all over again. It felt like I was some freak on display, like, _Oh look at the idiot who can’t read good! He must have shit for brains!_ It’s not even my fault, dammit! I survived an abortion, so of course some screws are loose! I bet Schmitty had a clean birth. I bet he was planned.” 

Mac sighed, “Well, there's nothing we can do about that, is there? We could teach you to read, but it seems a little late, doesn’t it?” 

“Yeah,” Dennis held up his beer. “Can’t teach an old dog new tricks, can you?” 

The other two raised their own drinks in agreement. “Amen.”


End file.
